LOVING OTHERS THROUGH LISTENINg

"My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry." [James 1:19]

In the context of this chapter, James is mainly talking about the Word of God. James is saying we need to be quick to hear the Word of God, slow to question it, and not get mad about what He says!

But this verse makes us think about our interactions with each other. Think for a minute about these three things: quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.

Which one is the easiest for you to do, and which one is the hardest?

For some reason one of the hardest things for us to do is to listen. We live in a world with so many platforms to voice our opinions and thoughts, but who is listening?

Dietrich Bonhoeffer in his book "Living life together" said:

"The first service that one owes to others, is the ministry of listening. And the beginning of love for others is listening to them."

Each of us has a deep longing to be heard and understood and we each have a story that is uniquely our own that is worthy of good, wise, and kind engagement. Sadly most of us are probably more familiar with being misunderstood than genuinely being heard.

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone when it dawns on you that the other person doesn't seem to understand or even care what you are saying?

Or, have you started sharing something within a group only to have another person take over the story and make it all about them?

It doesn't feel good does it?

Everyone has a story to tell. When we don't listen to that story we are communicating to the other person that they are alone, worthless, insignificant, rejected and unloved.

Yet, how incredible when we share our stories with someone who listens and engages with compassion and empathy. When someone sits with us face to face, leans in and listens wholeheartedly to what is being said, something deeply relational and healing takes place.

As John 13:35 indicates when we love those around us, especially through our listening engagement, we are reflecting the love of Jesus.

One of the ways Jesus loves us and invites us to love is through listening. Throughout the gospels, Jesus is shown actively listening to people's stories. Such as the woman at the well (John 4), the disciples on the road to Emmaus (Luke 24) and in his encounters with the needy.

To listen like Jesus is to listen deeply and it takes time. Jesus asked perceptive questions and then waited for answers. He intently listened with His heart as well as with His ears and mind.

Active listening is not easy to do and it takes practice. But when we learn to listen to God through His Word and in our prayer times, it will become easier to actively listen to people as well.

The practice of listening well is loving, honouring, and healing. Listening is being attuned to a person's heart and experience; joining them in their story, weeping as they weep, sharing their joy, and everything in between.

We embody the love and the heart of God for each other when we are present to each other, honouring one another, through our focused attention and attuned hearts.

How do you listen?

God bless